The Noddy and Big Ears joke

And finally this weeks joke.
This was told to me by my friend at Uni, Allan Willmore, during, what must have been a more than boring chemistry lecture.

One day Noddy decides to get in his car and go and visit his good friend Big Ears.

He starts the car and drives off, and he is so happy as he is going to see his good friend Big Ears.
He passes over the babbling brook and as he looks at the crystal waters he is filled with more happiness as he is going to see his good friend Big Ears.

As he drives further he passes Mrs Rabbit and he waves to her.
She waves back and his heart is filled with Jo0y as he is going to see his good friend Big Ears.

Then he comes to the final leg and turns down the beautiful green track that leads to Big Ears House.
Soon he will be there seeing his good friend Big Ears.

So he arrives at Big Ears's house and goes up to the front door.

He knocks and he is so happy, soon he will be seeing his good friend Big Ears.
Footsteps come down the hall, and then Big Ears opens the door.
BIg Ears sees who it is and says "Fuck off Noddy, ya' shit me."

Business as usual in NSW, one liar for another.

The new Premier of NSW, Mike Baird, has not wasted any time.
He wants to start making money as fast as possible.
And the biggest fat paycheck of them all is selling the NSW power grid, netting him and his cronies a cool thirty billion.
On Saturday, the 19th of April he said this to the Telegraph:
"I'd say look at the facts. The facts show very clearly that
electricity costs in Victoria since privatisation have been lower," he
said.

"They have been lower, you can't dispute that and yes there would be a
big scare campaign about this."
 
Well Mr Baird, I've got an issue with all three sentences you have uttered above.
First: "I'd say look at the facts."
I have, and you're gonna see the fruits of my researches in word and picture.
Second: "The facts show very clearly that electricity costs in Victoria since privatisation have been lower."
They aren't.
Reiterively, third:
"They have been lower, you can't dispute that and yes there would be a
big scare campaign about this."

Oh no they haven't.
If anyone is running a scare campaign, it's you, Mike.
A preemptive scare campaign.
The Premier's thrust seems to be, 'I've got to create a massive fear in the voters mind that if the power industry in NSW remains regulated, then their bills are going to be sky high.'
So, let us, as Mr Baird urges us to, look at the facts.
I went to the website of the Australian Energy Market Operator (AEMO).
This organisation was established in 2009 to manage the national energy and gas markets.
In the data section I found a history of power prices by state.
So I took the figures across to a spreadsheet and made this graph.

The yellow trendline on the graph represents the average price of electricity in Victoria.
It's recorded on the website as RRP (Regional Reference Price).
This is the standard used across the country to compare power prices.
I didn't make the trendline up, I used the spreadsheet analysis tools to "show trend".
So as we can see, power prices in Victoria have been steadily increasing since 1999.
privatisation has not made the price lower, quite the reverse.
So I contacted the Premier's office, attached my the graph to my email, and asked him this:
"Dear Premier,
The attached graph shows that the statements you made on Saturday to
the Daily Telegraph, printed on Saturday, April 19, are wrong.
So do you admit you were wrong?
Or are you a liar?"

Needless to say I have had no reply.

Sidebar: The conservatives will say, "it's the carbon tax that is making the trendline go up".
Well, no actually, the carbon tax was brought in in 2012, the trendline shows a steady increase from 1999.

So what is Mike Baird up to with the sale of NSW's power infrastructure.
Well it's an obvious money grab.
The sale will net $30 billion, and this will show NSW's finances in a healthier condition.
If, as the Premier suggests, the power prices in NSW will go down, then how will this happen?

It would seem that what the Premier is suggesting is that with a fully free-market power supply grid in NSW, the power companies will choose to put their prices down.
Excuse me while I clean my binoculars, as I have to go out and watch for airborne pigs.
Recently Origin Energy announced a profit of close on half a billion for 2013.Transgrid, another big player, announced $349.9 million profit.
These guys really like making making and most of that money, came from price rises.
Power bills for NSW householders have gone up 100% over the last six years.
At the same time, the price of coal fell from a peak of US$140 a tonne, down to around US$60 a tonne.

More than a hundred percent decrease in price.
Seventy five percent of all Australia's power comes from coal.
So the power companies put their price up when their main raw material is getting cheaper.
It therefore beggars belief that they are suddenly going to put their prices down when the market has been privatised.
So life in NSW continues as usual, the Premier is a liar, or he can't add up: either way, it doesn't auger well for the future of our state.
Finally, I hope that all those sinners have taken a woolly jacket, because they'll be holding the Winter Olympics on the south slopes of hell before power prices in NSW go down.